Doctor's appointments
Reading scriptures
Dishes
More laundry than normal (a little bit of potty training regression, but it's okay)
Playing with the kids/reading with the kids/disciplining the kids/running around with the kids/I think you get the picture :)
Looking for a new place to live (our place is too small for another baby) and all the details that go with that
Losing my credit card and switching all my auto pay bills over (plus all the headache that came along with losing it, ugh)
Making dinner
Meal planning
Trying to get a shower in
Getting sick
Haircuts
Paying bills and budgeting
Grocery shopping and finally returning unused clothes to the mall
Figuring out fun things to do with my family
Stuff regarding my calling (I'm in Young Women's!)
Praying, praying, praying
...and a million other things.
It's really nothing too different from my normal, every day life. And if I'm being realistic, my life is just going to get busier with each new transition our family goes through. But the hard thing has been how utterly chaotic and haphazard I feel.
I told Jayze last night as we were laying in bed that I was talking to Heavenly Father earlier and telling him how stressed I feel. There are so many things I want to organize or even just start but it's like all of these elements in my life are on a platter and I'm just picking and choosing from it every day. By the end of the day I feel accomplished by what I did get done, but then I look at all of the other things that needed to get done that didn't and then I feel like I accomplished nothing. I constantly feel like I'm running behind.
There are half-written to-do lists all over our apartment as well as a to-do list on my phone. We have a gigantic paper calendar on our wall I write on, but I still forget things because 1. pregnancy brain and 2. I don't incorporate my phone calendar enough. (I either write it on the calendar or put it in my phone, but the same event is usually not on both). We also have a big white board right next to our calendar, but have I updated it? Nope. I think the meal planning chart is a week behind, too.
Obviously it's been a struggle and something has to change, but it's nice to just write it all out even though I'm not quite sure where I'm going with this. But this is a safe space, right?
So, if someone is out there reading this and feeling the same way - you're not alone! And I'm going to keep telling myself that too...I'm not alone. I think it's good for us (me and my imaginary reader, because I'm not alone, remember?) to not be super organized, super mom, super wife, super homemaker, super put together, and super feel like we're winning at life all the time. Then we would never grow and learn.
So I'm going to keep figuring this craziness out, keep loving my kids and cute husband, and keep growing and learning from my failures. Don't give up.
...Annnnnd probably invest in a daily planner like my very patient husband suggested.
You're definitely not alone. It's crazy how at the end of the day you can feel utterly exhausted and accomplished...until you start looking at all the things that didn't get done. The point is that you're spending your time and energy on what is most important, which is your children, your husband, and your relationship with your Heavenly Father. Meal planning can wait. :)
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