Yesterday

After a series of not-so-good days, yesterday was a perfect day (according to the life of Sarah Flake).

I got to lay in bed for a few precious minutes before taking on the day in my mommy-wife-personal responsibilities. It was glorious.

After not taking a shower for way too many days, I fit in two, separate showers.

Kimball went four hours in-between feedings and took long, regular naps. 

It was the first time bathing Kimball in the kitchen sink without the little bathtub, and it was a success!

The kids and I got in some good playing time, especially Aidan and me. "Mom, play?"

I rocked my exercise, even though I was not feeling it. Some days are just like that. 

I studied my scriptures and even had time to read a regular book, too.

Both kids went down for a nap at the same time, albeit in separate rooms.  

I took both of the kids outside. We took out the trash, paid rent, checked the mail, then had a fun few minutes playing on the grass.  

I had the energy to whip up two beautiful, homemade pizzas. Having an oven has really made baking fun again. 

Aidan scarfed down the beautiful, veggie-loaded pizza. Winner dinner.

Even though Jayze had a spontaneous work dinner, the evening was still fun and relaxing with just me and the kids. 

Aidan let me sing two verses of our bedtime song while rocking him. Afterwards, we laughed at Kimball eating his toes and kicking his legs in the bouncer.  

Both of the kids went to bed in the same room at the same time. (YES!)

I got some veg time in before Jayze came home. Then he helped me with the dishes while we talked about our day. Then we snuggled in bed while still talking about our day. 

It was the most wonderful evening. 

Good days like yesterday make the not-so-good days worth it. I'm grateful for both so I can notice the difference. 

Happy November!

New Goals

Lately, my thoughts have been scattered, and it has been hard to put my feelings into words. I think that writer's block is a real thing, and I'm trying to take Stephen King's advice of, "You must not come lightly to a blank page" (On Writing).

It seems that the past few weeks - probably ever since we moved to Kansas - I've had up and down days. One day I'll be super motivated and get so many things done. I'll happily check things off my to-do list and feel proud of what I accomplished that day. Then the next day I'm in a slump. The crushing, overwhelming realization of all I still need to do hits me. The motivation I had the previous day leaves, and I end up feeling discouraged about my seemingly poor efforts in my roles as a mother, homemaker, and wife. It has been quite the roller coaster, to say the least.

"When you're in a Slump, 

you're not in for much fun. 

Un-slumping yourself is not easily done."

(Dr. Seuss, Oh the Places You'll Go!)

Many different thoughts and ideas have crossed my mind of what I can do to do better and be better - as a person in society, in church, and in my home. Yet, it seems there's not enough time in the day, and my priorities tend to get off course. It has been a struggle finding the precarious balance between giving my all to all of my different roles. 

As I've pondered this and more, one thought that keeps coming back is to just keep working on myself and everything will work out. Don't waste my time comparing myself to others and utilize my time for improving me. So, naturally, the question popped up, "What can I do to improve me when I already have so many things to do that others need?" 

For example, moving to-do's like car registration, unpacking boxes, and organizing in such a small space, and so on. Daily to-do's like feeding my kids, changing diapers, playing with my kids, dishes, dinner, laundry, and cleaning the house. All of these "to-do's" affect me and make me feel less stressed when they're done, but I'm left wondering when I can do simple things for me, like reading my scriptures, taking a shower, painting my nails (anyone who knows me knows I love painting my nails), blogging, exercising, sometimes even brushing my teeth (gross, I know).

Sometimes a mom/wife life is hard. It's stretching yourself thin, making sure everyone else is okay first and then checking in with you. So, since I've been feeling a little stretched thin lately and want to find balance between it all, I've decided to set new goals to help me un-slump myself and be motivated at least 80% of the time, instead of 50%. 

My list is small and simple, but do-able. These are what I'm going to work on this week, and next week I'll check in with how I did.

• Get up at six every morning and exercise (a goal both my husband and I have set).
• Pray more. Even if I can only do it in my heart at certain times. Try to kneel and say my prayers out loud as much as possible.
• Write in my journal every evening.
• Get outside with the kids more, especially Aidan. 
• Spend less time on my phone.
• Smile more. Be happy. Don't take things too seriously. Some things just aren't worth getting mad over.
• Look for the good.

"Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time."

~Thomas A. Edison~ 

Pictures from yesterday while waiting for Jayze to get off work.

Limitations

New Years Resolutions, the 2014 Winter Olympics, Lizze Velasquez, C.S. Lewis, my sister-in-law who ran a marathon recently, and others have been on my mind lately.  I know, that's a lot.  But I was thinking about all these things and how each of them have to deal with opposition.

Once someone makes a New Years Resolution, it usually goes out the window once February 1st comes around.  Those who are in the 2014 Winter Olympics had to (and still have to) work and dedicate themselves like crazy in order to even compete.  Lizzie Velasquez was labeled the Ugliest Girl in the World.  C.S. Lewis' conversion story is amazing.  And my sister-in-law who ran a marathon ran it against all odds (her husband's in nursing school, she teaches piano lessons to over 20 students, and she has three kids four years old and under). 

All these things are really inspirational and motivational if you think about it.  What are the odds that someone would be successful enough to compete in the Olympics?  What are the odds that, despite her syndrome, Lizzie Velasquez would become a motivational speaker, as well as achieve 90% of her goals?  What are the odds that someone actually accomplishes the goals they set for the new year?  What are the odds that my sister-in-law would find time to run a marathon?  And what are the odds that C.S. Lewis would end up believing in God?

It seems that the success of others usually comes with a lot of opposition.  And, sadly, I think a lot of that opposition comes from those around us.  Lizzie Velasquez described the comments people made when someone labeled her the ugliest girl in the world.  One person said she should do the world a favor and shoot herself.  I couldn't believe that!  Why would anyone tell someone else to kill themselves just because of outward appearance?  Sadly, that person doesn't realize that it's not about outward appearance; it's about your inward beauty.  Before the Lord chose David as the king of Bethlehem, he said to Samuel of David's brother, "Look not on his countenance, or on the height of his stature; because I have refused him: for the Lord ^aseeth not as ^bman seeth; for man looketh on the outward ^cappearance, but the ^dLord looketh on the ^eheart" (1 Samuel 16:7).  When it really comes down to it, the Lord doesn't care about outward appearance.  I truly believe Lizzie Velasquez is beautiful because of her positive outlook, her drive to succeed, and her cute personality.  She is, literally, one in a million.  And yes, I know what literally means :). (source http://clashdaily.com/2014/01/labelled-worlds-ugliest-woman-lizzie-velasquez-knows-god-sees-true-beauty/#FqjCJFXuvx7iX5D2.01)

I won't go into the other examples, but it's amazing how we, imperfect human beings can bring others down.  Why do we do this?  I think it's because we are intimidated by others' successes.  Because if others succeed where does that leave us?  Does that mean we're not being successful?  Maybe it's because their accomplishments remind us of our unmet goals which causes us to react negatively as a defense mechanism. Whatever the case, I think we should follow President Uchtdorf's advice and just "Stop it" (watch the video here - it's really good and it's only three minutes :)).

It's okay if someone wants to have nine kids in 11 years.  It's okay if someone wants to run an Ironman when he or she is 23 years old, in graduate school, and has a family.  It's okay if someone from a small town wants to go to an Ivy League school.  It's okay if someone wants to, against all odds, become a singer, actor, mother or father, dancer, fireman, astronaut, musician, president of the United States, founder of a successful business, writer, and many other things.

I think we have enough opposition without discouragement from others.  We have enough opposition without others bringing us down and saying, "You're crazy!" or "Maybe you should shoot for a smaller, more do-able dream."  Why should we limit ourselves? 

I have to remind myself to not be a discouragement and an opposition to those around me.  Just this semester, my husband told me his goals, and I was like, "Are you sure?  Remember last semester when it was really hard?  Maybe you could do this instead..."  Then I thought about my own New Years Resolutions and the goals I want to accomplish and the things I wish I would have done but didn't because I didn't think I was someone who could do something great or unexpected.  I thought, "Why am I limiting Jayze?  Shouldn't I, of all people, be rooting for him?  Cheering him on when no one else will?  Believing in him when no one else does?"  Yes, I should be that person to cheer him and other people on.  Just because other people succeed doesn't mean that I can't.  It doesn't mean they are better than me or that it's an "in your face" type of thing.  People succeed because they have this driving force and driving desire to succeed.  And because other people are intimidated, they try to put others' dreams to rest.  They try to put their fire out.

I, for one, want to be the one who says, "Oh, you're running a marathon?  Good for you!"  Or, "You made a goal to sing in American Idol?  I'll vote for you!"  Or, "You're in the middle of writing a book?  Let me know when it comes out so I can read it!"  Or, "You want to accomplish [goal]?  Well, what's your plan to accomplish that?  How can I help support you?"

There are so many positive things we could say to others that can help them maintain and even grow their burning desire to succeed.  I hope that I can keep that mindset and be positive and supportive of other people's successes as well as succeed at my own goals. 

New Year's Resolutions

Okay, so I have been thinking about this since BEFORE January 1st, and I still haven't written them all down or have them all figured out.  New Year's Resolutions.

Maybe I'm scared that if I actually write them down then I will feel stressed about them.  I'll feel pressure to get them done and then feel like a failure if I don't achieve them.  BUT, that's just self-doubt starting to creep in, sooooo here goes....


Over-arching goal - Be Consistent

Now think of a spiderweb under the "Be Consistent."  (If you are reading this Brianne, thanks for the tip on the periods inside the quotes, you know what I'm talking about - you are always right!)  :)  Below are five areas I want to be consistent in this year.  And why is that?  Because being consistent is soooo hard for me!  I try to do too many things at once, start out really great, then start slacking off and end up dropping the whole thing.  So, that is why the main goal is to be consistent.

Be consistent in:

1.  Emotional - Write in my journal once a day and write in my blog at least once a week.  I've heard that if you want to be a good writer then you must write.  My goal is to become a freelance editor, and if you are a good editor, then you are a good writer.  If you are a good writer then chances are you are a good editor.  It goes hand-in-hand.  Writing in my journal is therapy and writing on my blog helps me watch what I write more closely.  Perfect practice.  :)

2. Mental - Still haven't figured this one out.  I'm thinking about reading a non-fiction book once a month, or even just reading one or two books a month.  Even with all the reading that goes on in college, I feel like I'm out of practice.  Reading out of a textbook just isn't the same as reading what you choose.  Being an English major, I want to get out there and read some books like Les Miserables, Crime and Punishment, The Count of Monte Cristo, and other books like that.  We'll see. 

3. Physical - BYU-Idaho has what they call the 9-week Fitness Challenge.  You exercise at least three hours a week for nine weeks; go to one, on-campus evening fitness class a week; and attend one wellness workshop.  My goal is to exercise at least four times a week, and I think doing the 9-week challenge this semester will be great motivation.

4. Spiritual - Read my scriptures every day, even if it's just one verse.  To help me get in the habit, I want to do the 40 Days Closer to Christ.  I have done it once before, and it helped me stay consistent with my scripture reading as well as fall in love with the scriptures again.  Essentially, if you follow it, you end up reading the entire Book of Mormon in 40 days.  After that, I'll stick to studying by topic and other scripture study practices. 

5. Social - Still working on this one, too.  :) 


Here's to a beautiful, adventurous, improving, awesome, stressful, joyous, NEW YEAR!  :)